Statistical Goodness 3.0 - The Language Edition

The white board that was once dedicated to me jotting down Elena's achievements needs to be re-purposed, and so rather than find the baby book I will just archive the information here.

Starting at 6 months ("all finished" was recognized by the pediatrician during her 6 month appointment that she wanted "all finished" as soon as possible), she learned the following signs in something close to the order they're listed:

all finished
more
eat
dada
drink
cracker
diaper
bonka (grandma)
banana
water
milk
sleepy
thank you
fish
apple
bird
cat
horse
dog
"big uh-oh" (or "poopy" - a made-up sign taught by Aunt Kathy and Grandma just after her first birthday consisting of holding her nose)
book
airplane
car
soap
"wash hands"
boat
train
cookie
yogurt
hot
blanket
"change diaper"
bath
bike
noodles
hot

Signs we had wanted to learn, but never did: cold, medicine, doctor, cow, sheep, pig, cheese

Words - her first words were "Dada" and "dog" at 10 months, followed by:

"bebe" (baby)

mama

thank you ("taaaankoo")

broccoli (16 months)

ball

"Bye mama" (first 2 word phrase at 17 months, often closely followed by)

"go go" (17 months - would stand in front of gate, armed with some sort of bag, urging me, I suppose, to take her somewhere fun)

down (which also meant up for the longest time)

doctor (at 18 month appointment, which flattered the doctor)

"Bro!" (circa fall 2009, one of the few people who would text message Sebastian was Brian, the singer of their band. He calls everyone "bro" and when the text message tone would sound, Saby would duly check and announce in exaggerated imitation of Brian, that it was "Broooooo-w". Somewhere Elena picked up on this and began yelling "Bro!" anytime Saby's phone would ring, which much delighted us and ESPECIALLY Brian, who is still known as Bro to her to this day.)

On our India trip, she learned "Caca" (Malayalam for crow, and very onomatopoeic, no?) and "palli", Malayalam name for the salamander-sized house lizards that abound everywhere except my mother-in-law's house


First three word phrase: "I do it" (learned from buddy Sophia while on the playground July 3rd)

She then had one that involved "mama. eating. ______." more, perhaps? I need to decrease my appetite, apparently, if it's that obvious to a 22 month old.

Other notable combinations include:

Complimentary mentions of her friends. "Pretty baby Micah" was a shout out to the beautiful baby sister of best friend "Fee-ya" (Sophia) And calling her buddy Andy "Fee-ya" meant she loved him just as much. Her boyfriend Gabriel was known as "Maeee" and then "Maeeeeb," and finally is just regular but much beloved "Gabe" now.

"two, two pacis." at some point in Spring of 2010, her obsession with the number two (and therefore object plurality, I suppose) led her to request two pacis every night. This became a requirement for her to be comfortable enough to go to bed. We indulged it until her 2nd birthday and still do on occasional "tough" nights

Along those same lines, "waaaaaan [one], TWO! waaan two WAAAN [etc.] I told Saby she was counting in binary code and he corrected me... binary is 0 and 1; she was counting in tertiary.

"moush! eating!" her name and description of current favorite movie, Ratatouille, recorded on the DVR. She knows where all the commercials are (asking me, "Mo', moush?" a few seconds before the break comes and then describing what comes after the break - "moush. egg! coo-king." or "dada. ego." [she thinks one of the cooks looks like Dada, and another oft-referenced character is Anton Ego])

"pretty ________" insert any word she knows. Pretty penguins. Pretty Momma. Pretty Dada. Pretty necknace (necklace)

"Yesh, ma'am. Yesh, Way-cha" (Yes ma'am, yes Rachel) After spending two days during our move with our friend (who hails from the Deep South) Rachel May, Elena came back a polite little belle. But any "yes ma'am" was always accompanied by a nod to her etiquette coach, "yes Way-cha".

Perhaps our all time favorite, that we never correct in hopes that she'll go to college mispronouncing it... "O-PONSH" It means "open" and has a very wide variety of uses... opening doors, unbuckling seatbelts, unscrewing lids, turning on the water faucet, taking off a diaper. She will ask you to "oponsh" (take off) your bracelet so that she can wear it... proving all that gypsy training paid off!

I have a two year old

I have a two year old!

Her name is E-Unit. She is the prototype for many more Units who have speculated launch dates of fall 2011, 2013 and perhaps even 2015. So far, and especially for being a first model, I've very pleased with how she's performed.

She sleeps well, sleeps lots, and goes down without drama. Eats decently. Poos and pees consistently with minimal leakage. Our model has a few upgrades, like immodestly good coordination and a penchant for singing. Our favorite upgrade? She has RHYTHM... I swear to God, she can keep a beat after 24 months on this earth. These features and upgrades seem to be just as novel and entertaining for her as they are to us; much like when she was 4 and 5 months old and thrilled with the realization of various structural design aspects like her hands and feet.

We've logged quite a few miles with the E-unit, having been to Michigan at 6 weeks, Chicago at 4 months, Florida at 10 months, and India at 19 months. Each varying terrain and climate has been handled phenomenally by the Unit - although the India trip proved that the E-units ideal operating temperature is probably somewhere below 90 degrees Fahrenheit. With proper upkeep and maintenance, our E-Unit seems ready to tackle any challenge we put before her.

We are not without bugs and flaws in our system, though. As she neared her second year of life, the E-Unit has been plagued with minor problems. Irritations namely, but together they do bring down her (and therefore, our family's) efficiency level. She's been making a strange sound a lot... "No." "No no no no no no." It can be provoked by user error - asking a question, offering something, or even just a statement can result in hearing this annoying sound. Luckily we've realized that sufficient nourishment, lubrication, cleaning and entertainment can lower the frequency of this problem.

I have to say, in all honesty [and no modesty, har har har], that I think many people envy our E-Unit. But that's the thing they don't understand. ANYONE can have an E-Unit. With proper research and a good, thorough instruction manual, any Unit rolling off the assembly line, provided it's a factory utilizing good materials and a quality workforce, can be as good or better than ours.

Happy birthday, E-Unit! Keep on rollin' strong!