Happy Pants

Saludos, toodles... I'm officially 4 months pregnant. That's a whole new trimester. How I scoffed at the books that said things like... 14 weeks... 15 weeks... you will definitely be wearing maternity clothes by now. Ha! I was wearing maternity clothes because I work at Motherhood Maternity... not because I needed them. And that was only the tops. No pants.

Until Friday, January 26th.

I was helping out at the other Motherhood, which is essentially a department within Macy's. (whoo hoo Dayton Mall, you so faaaancy with your two maternity stores!!) Not a lot to do up there, as there's no cash register, dressing rooms, and oftentimes, no customers. Thus this little corner of Macy's (between the fatty clothes and "intimate apparel") is chock full o' stock. Every rack is just brimming with sweaters, pants, panties, camis, sleepwear, pants, clearance... so much that any innocent browsers who pull an item towards them for a closer look leave that piece of clothing hanging mid-air, supported against gravity by the equal and opposing force of hundreds of other clearance tops and pant suits. Without going into further unnecessary details about the physics of retail merchandising, I was basically up there to straighten and tidy the entire department.

Easy enough, job done. Don't tell Mother's Work Inc., but I even took about 35 minutes to take a walk through the mall and eat a piece of mushroom pizza from Sbarro's. But towards my 9pm end time I still had two rouge pairs of pants that I could find no home for. So I clocked out and took them over to the fitting room. And tried them on. And...

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Orgasmic sigh of delicious comfortable relief. And a sudden realization that I was HOT. (was - at the time. still am now too) After a week or two of wearing my size 13 Charlotte Russe jeans (yeah, it was a hard call, but I convinced myself that particular style ran small... I had bought them with Marena in Chicago when I was about 6 days pregnant) with growing discomfort, especially when sitting down for 8 hours a day, I had picked up two fabulous pairs of seven dollar athletic pants from Steve and Barry's. Essentially fancier sweat pants, that had a nice enough cut to them that they passed off as biz casual for work... and that I wore to sleep, work, work out, and, that fateful Friday, to Macy's. They were getting a lot of good use but I only realized that the black pair I had on had shrunk up to a niiiiiicely conspicuous flood pant. Which made me feel like a tool. So donning those perfect length petite medium black twills with the mid-belly was like stepping into a pair of custom-made Levis.

I spun around and looked at my backside. Nice!

The second pair was equally delightful. Green cargos with neat little pockets. Another mid belly. Deeeeelightful. Bought 'em both. Came home and modeled. Felt like a real honest-to-goodness pregnant lady in my new happy pants.

Some ladies hold out until they're at the point of no return. We had a lady on Saturday who walked out in an entire outfit - ENTIRE outfit - after coming in to buy her first maternity clothes at like 5 or 6 months. Bless her heart... she bought pants, shirts, bras, and undies... and handed me a fist full of tickets and a packet of panties with one missing. I got it. She was wearing it all out. Good for her.

But you gotta get the pants. Wearing your regular jeans with a tummy sleeve or bella band will make you feel like a fat a**. Wearing maternity pants makes me realize that it's just my abdominal area that's expanding, and that perhaps that time on the elliptical is making my posterior even nicer. I dunno. I've never felt like I've had slimmer legs than now.

God bless the designers at Motherhood Maternity!

That was more of a ramble than anything... but I'm a little flustered after the season premier of Lost :-)